In ode to my recent domain move (again) — it says a lot without words… :
Image by 'Desert Dan' over at Flickr
Self,
The past few days, these lyrics have been so accurate. They are more meaningful when you reach this part of your mind when in the process of healing and change. The world starts to become like a pin cushion — causing your eyes to leak at the slightest heightened voice, and your heart to hurt every time sorrow crosses its path.
Happy days are near, positive change is on the horizon and life will be more meaningful because you held strong and firm. God does love you – always…
***
You teach me lessons that I never seem to learn
You build another bridge for
every one I burn
You believe in me
Far beyond my limitations
It’s hard
to live up to the faith you have in me
Your patience sees the person I could
never be
And says that’s who I am
In spite of all I’ve been
Even
though you know what’s in my heart
Why do you love me? Why are you
here?
When I don’t give you a reason to even want to care
Why do you
suffer my private pain?
I can’t believe the things you’ve seen me
through
Why do you love me like you do?
When I can’t see beyond the
shadows of my past
When all my treasured dreams are slipping from my
grasp
You restore my hope
Far beyond my expectations
You are a warrior
to the demons at my door
When I am not enough then you’re a little more
An
answer to a prayer
When no one else is there
A hero in my deepest hour of
need
Why do you love me? Why are you here?
When I don’t give you a
reason to even want to care
Why do you suffer my private pain
I can’t
believe the selflessness of you
Why do you love me like you do?
I can’t
believe the things you’ve seen me through
Why do you love me like you do?
–Jericho Road
Listen to Audio – sample here.
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We’re off to a GREAT start! Clark and I decided to give in to the ‘Acai Craze’ and purchase a bottle of 100% pure Acai Juice. We bantered about on whether to purchase the ‘free trials’ that are spread all over the internet, but after reading the reviews of those companies who offer the free trial – we thought it best to purchase local and to purchase 100% pure. Too many scams and possible scams to even bother dealing with and what better way to see if it works than to get the pure juice – right?
We got this bottle from Whole Foods (duh, who else 
) and already we feel the power of the berries! WOW! Awesome energy right away, and my mind feels more alert. I didn’t even know what to expect until after I had taken it and THEN read some faq’s about it. Clark found a great site that offers some exciting information about Acai Berries. Excerpts below:
Acai Berry and Mental State:
In addition to the many physical health benefits of acai including; improved digestion, strengthened immune system, weight loss, and heart disease prevention; acai is also an effective way to improve brain function, and fight of mental disorders.Acai, with the help of antioxidants, is able to lower the occurrence of xenobiotics, and other toxins. Xenobiotics are a leading cause of depression, anxiety, schizophrenia, and other mental disorders. Acai is especially effective compared to other fruits, as it has the highest potency of antioxidants. So far, there hasn’t been a fruit discovered that can even come close.
The vitamins and omega fatty acids found in acai berriescan also strengthen the connection of neurotransmitters. This can lead to improved brain function, and helps one stay focused, even when we are bombarded with the many distractions of every day life.
The elimination of free radicals and other toxins can actually strengthen the brain allowing it to function more effectively. By doing so we can improve our sex lives, get better sleep, and reduce the risk of being diagnosed with the many mental illnesses people suffer from. Regular use of acai has even been linked to the prevention of Alzheimer’s disease, an illness that is often regarded as most difficult to cope with.
As far fetched as some of these claims may appear, modern science is constantly revealing more about the brain and how it works. This has lead to the discovery of many natural ways we can improve its function and fight off mental illness.
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Acai Berry for Weight Loss:
There are many new, high tech, weight loss treatments available today, ranging from liposuction to gastric bypass surgery. Not that these aren’t viable weight loss solutions, but they are far from cheap, and can leave you feeling uncomfortable in your own skin.
The reason the acai berry’s popularity has skyrocketed in recent months is because you can obtain the same results as these expensive surgeries, without the discomfort. In fact, acai is actually a far superior weight loss solution. Not only can you lose significant amounts of weight in a short period of time, but it also promotes overall health and well being.
After just a week of regular use, users of acai report increased energy level, fast weight loss, and better mental focus. This all natural, weight loss, super fruit is possible due to the large amount of antioxidants that it contains. These antioxidants help eliminate toxins and free radicals that have serious negative effects on our body, even though we don’t necessarily always notice it. Sadly, we usually have to see the benefits before we realize how big of a toll these toxins take on our bodies.
Acai also tastes great, another reason behind this fruit’s popularity. Unfortunately, the acai berry perishes very quickly, and the only place you can find it is along the Amazon River. As a result, the only way to get it remotely fresh is to get it in juice or freeze dried pulp form.
Many manufacturers have been able to harness the power of acai in supplement form, often times combined with additional vitamins and other nutrients. These products are ideal for those with fast paced lifestyles that prevents them from being able to make juice, but are looking to lose weight quickly. More on Weight Loss…
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Now, we just barely started – but I’m just excited about the ‘mental benefits’ to taking Acai on a regular basis! Woo hoo!!!
The effects of the relationship between a Mother and Father has on their children, I have learned is more vital than most of us [I'm sure] realize.
Cummings, the Notre Dame Professor of Psychology, and researchers from Rochester University and the Catholic University of America, found that the manner in which parents handle everyday marital conflicts has a significant effect on how secure their children feel, and, in turn, significantly affects their future emotional adjustment.
In the first study, the researchers examined the effect of marital conflict on the 9- to-18-year-old children of 226 parents for three years. They discovered that destructive forms of marital conflict ─ such as personal insults, defensiveness, marital withdrawal, sadness or fear ─ set in motion events that later led to emotional insecurity and maladjustment in children, including depression, anxiety and behavioral problems.
The second study also examined the connection between marital conflict and emotional problems over a three-year period, with a different group of 232 parents and kindergarten-aged children. The researchers again found that destructive marital conflict led to similar problems.
Interestingly enough, earlier studies by Cummings and others have found that constructive marital conflict, in which parents express or engage in physical affection, problem solving, compromise or positive feelings, may actually increase children’s security.
“These studies are a warning to strongly encourage parents to learn how to handle conflicts constructively for the sake of both their children and themselves,” Cummings said.
["New studies confirm impact of parental conflict on children's futures" By William G. Gilroy]
It’s a bed of roses for those who’ve never had to witness their parents fight or call each other names. It’s bliss when they see them be affectionate (even if it is “gross” to see them kiss). But do we ever stop and think how our relationship with our spouse affects our kids, nieces, or nephews? These ‘little eyes’ are watching our every move – are we making sure we reflect the good and safely shield them from the bad? We all know the reality — there will be disagreements, there will be tension – but do we need to reveal that to the innocent minds of those around us? Do we need to be so selfish to think “I have every right to express my emotions openly!”
Witnessing anger or conflict can be aversive for children and it is often associated with increased arousal, distress, and aggression as well as long-term adjustment difficulties including behavioral, emotional, social, and academic problems. Children from homes characterized by high conflict appear to be vulnerable to externalizing problems such as verbal and physical aggression, noncompliance, and delinquency, as well as internalizing problems such as depression and anxiety (Cummings and Davies 1994). Typically, however, stronger associations are found with externalizing rather than internalizing problems. Living with marital conflict also increases the risk of children displaying poor interpersonal skills and low levels of social competence (Cummings, Davies, and Campbell 2000).
Summary of the Research on the Effects of Conflict
* Some children respond to parental conflict by acting out. They may demonstrate behavior problems, increased anger and inability to manage anger, violent behavior, delinquency, and gang involvement.
* Some children respond to parental conflict by turning inward. They are likely to demonstrate depression (we are prescribing anti-depressants for children at an alarming rate), isolation from friends and activities, physical symptoms like headaches, stomach aches, ulcers etc., and substance abuse.
* Children who are exposed to parental conflict do not interact well with others. These kids often have very poor social skills, low self esteem and poor relationships when they become adults.
* Some children exposed to high conflict have trouble thinking. Advances in neuropsychology have shown that when exposed to conflict our brains release stress hormones that over time can actually change brain functioning. Scary stuff! The effects of being exposed to conflict show up as problems in school, truancy, impaired thinking (things like problem-solving, abstract reasoning, memory are affected) and symptoms that mimic Attention Deficit Disorder.
["The Effects of Conflict The High Price Your Children Pay"]
There are too many homes where children fear their parents or where wives fear their husbands. Our leaders have reminded us that “fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness,” and warned “that individuals who … abuse spouse or offspring … will one day stand accountable before God.” 5 The adversary knows that if he can foster an atmosphere of contention, conflict, and fear in the home, the Spirit is grieved, and the cords that ought to bind the family are weakened.
The resurrected Lord Himself declared, “For verily, verily I say unto you, he that hath the spirit of contention is not of me, but is of the devil, who is the father of contention, and he stirreth up the hearts of men to contend with anger, one with another” (3 Ne. 11:29).
When we feel anger or contention in our homes, we should immediately recognize what power has taken control of our lives and what Satan is endeavoring to accomplish. Solomon provided us this wise formula: “A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger” (Prov. 15:1).
Our home should ideally be a refuge where each member feels safe, secure, loved, and insulated from harsh criticism and contention that we so often encounter in the world.
The popular view of our day has been that we are not responsible for our feelings; they just happen. In this view, other people and events cause us to feel certain things, and so our only choice is how we are going to show our anger.
Burton Kelly, however, points out that emotional responses like anger are actually choices that we make. “For us to feel emotion,” he writes, “we must first be aware of some stimulus—an event, a thought, a memory. Then we interpret that stimulus—and that’s when the emotional response comes. Our interpretation can be relatively positive, neutral, or negative.” (Ensign, Feb. 1980, p. 9.) The stimulus itself has no inherent emotional charge; the emotion comes from within us because of how we choose or are conditioned to see the stimulus.
Thus, to be angry is a choice we make; it is not “caused” by anything or anyone outside ourselves. If we can teach our children, in both words and actions, that choosing not to respond in anger is within our control, we will teach them one of life’s most valuable lessons…
Let us not hurt the ones we love the most by selfish criticism! In our families, small arguments and petty criticisms, if allowed to go unchecked, can poison relationships and escalate into estrangements, even abuse and divorce. Instead, just like we learned with the poisonous venom, we must “make full haste” to reduce arguments, eliminate ridicule, do away with criticism, and remove resentment and anger. We cannot afford to let such dangerous passions ruminate—not even one day.
The Savior said, “Wherefore, I say unto you, that ye ought to forgive one another; for he that forgiveth not his brother his trespasses standeth condemned before the Lord; for there remaineth in him the greater sin.” 5
This is not to say that forgiveness is easy. When someone has hurt us or those we care about, that pain can almost be overwhelming. It can feel as if the pain or the injustice is the most important thing in the world and that we have no choice but to seek vengeance. But Christ, the Prince of Peace, teaches us a better way. It can be very difficult to forgive someone the harm they’ve done us, but when we do, we open ourselves up to a better future. No longer does someone else’s wrongdoing control our course. When we forgive others, it frees us to choose how we will live our own lives. Forgiveness means that problems of the past no longer dictate our destinies, and we can focus on the future with God’s love in our hearts.
We’re all trying our best, and never want to hurt our children. But it’s worth evaluating our actions with an open and honest [and humble] mind. It’s never too late to fix what might be broken…
Knowing that we are in mortality to learn and to develop our faith, we should understand that there must be opposition in all things. During a family council in my own home, my wife said, “When you may think that someone has a perfect family, you just do not know them well enough.”
Brothers and sisters, as parents let us heed the admonition, even the rebuke, given by the Lord to Joseph Smith and the leaders of the Church in 1833 to “set in order [our] own house” (D&C 93:43). “I have commanded you to bring up your children in light and truth” (D&C 93:40). “Set in order [our] family, and see that they are more diligent and concerned at home, and pray always, or they shall be removed out of their place” (D&C 93:50).
The prophets of our day have given a similar admonition and warning to parents to set in order our families. May we be blessed with the inspiration and love to meet opposition with faith within our families. We will then know that our trials are to draw us closer to the Lord and to one another. May we listen to a prophet’s voice and set in order our own homes (see D&C 93:41–49). The family is strengthened as we draw near to the Lord, and each member of the family is strengthened as we lift and strengthen and love and care for one another. “Thee lift me and I’ll lift thee, and we’ll ascend together” (Quaker proverb).
What is more fun than shopping at Whole Foods? Shopping at Whole Foods with a CELEBRITY! Ok, so she isn’t Patrick Dempsey (which would have turned me into a nervous wreck) but Clark and I still about peed our pants with joy that we spotted another celebrity!
Here we were, standing at the Whole Foods deli ordering a sandwich to share and across the counter on the other end was Sandra Oh (Grey’s Anatomy) ordering herself some food. She looks EXACTLY like herself on TV. What made this whole experience extra fun was checking out at the register and realizing that our backs were touching! I know, really lame – and usually I don’t care about celebrities, but I find myself more and more excited about it all when I can say that I touched one.
The reality is, they are easy to ’super-size’ because they’re rich and famous — but these people are just like you and I. They have a job — that just so happens to pay them [too much] — which in the end makes them all sparkley and ooey gooey. I despise the fact that I was EXTREMELY excited to see someone [who's on TV] that I actually recognized undeniably right away, and the fact that I’m blogging about it while my heart races with excitement… I’m giggling over the fact that Clark was just as excited to see her and recognized her just as quick… *sigh*…
It was really funny to see a girl run up to her in the store and full on hug her, she stepped back and said “Oh, you are the BEST actress in the whole world! I love you! I … I … I… just can’t believe that you’re standing here right in front of me!” Sandra smiled and then laughed a bit and said very kindly, “Thank you, thank you very much!”
Sandra was very layed back and chill. She didn’t seem to mind at all that people were staring at her and that crazed fan hugged her. That’s cool to see.
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